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Wait a minute. What do we want from this man? He went to war to keep the country one. He handed over power to civilians at a time that it had never been done, never mind that he might not have had the loyalty of the army behind him, but wasn’t Danjuma there? He launched Operation Feed the Nation to produce food for Nigeria. We told him that he was uneducated, he wrote books., yet, we sniggered that it was Tekena Tamuno who put it together. He did not exterminate the Nigerian middle class, when SAP was about to do that, he authored ‘There is an alternative to SAP’ He was accused of not being the writer because the grammar, syntax and outlay of the write up was beyond him. But…….

He was falsely accused of a coup plot, condemned to death which was later changed into a prison term. Inside the prison he continued to farm which shows humility and resourcefulness. In the third year, we Nigerians came and begged him to come out of prison he refused and told our emissary, Abubakar, that he was safer there. We did not relent. We took him out of prison against his personal wishes and desire and sent Ibrahim Gusau to offer him the crown of president, he refused. Why was I not offered the post of president? Ehm ehm…is it because I am from the minority? We sent all leading members of the conservative northern and south western politicians to beg him. We enacted a fiat absolving him of all accusations said to have been committed by him, then, and in the future. The losses sustained in his farming business were repaid extra budgetary. He did not write the constitution, neither did he see or read it before swearing to uphold it, but, he believes in his heart that false democracy is better than no democracy so he accepted, all because he loves the Nigerian koinonia. What do we want from this man, ungrateful Nigerians?

He travels to Atlanta to meet with Nigerians[?] in the Diaspora, and we try to take advantage of him, instead of thanking God that he has graced us with his presence. What is the matter with these Eboes? Don’t they know that, they are the only nationality Nigeria cannot do without? Think I am joking? Let the Yoruba’s say they want to leave Nigeria today, you know what would happen? A sovereign national conference would be hurriedly called and their share of the national debt would be allocated to them. Forget all this OPC wahala, na shakara. The core north is fighting tooth and nail to stay in Nigeria, ever since Orkar fired an arrow across their nostrils. Hence, the power shift. Of the ‘Aaro metas’, that prop up the Nigerian state, the Eboes are the only indispensable group and they should be proud of it. [Abubakar Rimi came to remind them of this in Dallas, at the World Igbo Conference, though, they forgot to ask him what ever happened to Gideon Akaluka?] 

A benevolent dictator craves respect rather than fear, that is why Baba told the Eboe questioner to ‘go to hell’. What has he not done for the Eboes? He has restored the rank of Eboe soldiers and paid them arrears after they had tried to kill him during the war. He even went to Awka to plant trees. He tried to marry an Eboe woman but the bride price was too high, and the Obi wanted to pass off an Osu woman on to him. Is Stanley Macebuh not an Eboe? Didn’t he tell us that Baba is a benevolent dictator? Did Baba deny it? Have Nigerians not read the characteristics of a benevolent dictator?

This type of dictator pretends to protect and care about public finance and probity. Hasn’t Baba put the Anticorruption Bill in place. He cannot spend money on frivolities. He does not waste money on athletes who win medals, and artists should be best advised to find other means of survival, because there will never be a throng of musicians lining up the streets of Abuja to cheer him. He has even banned the playing of the talking drum in Abuja. He resurrected the offshore/onshore dichotomy in order to save funds but paid Ondo State her offshore derivation in order to have peace., but what else can a man do? Charity begins at home.

A benevolent dictator has to appear dignified. Baba has been wearing embroidered agbada. We then started to accuse him of wearing over embroidered guinea brocade. We didn’t even leave it at this, we have asked him to wear a suit and tie. If God wanted him to wear a suit why didn’t he make him a white man with a slim stature? The benevolent dictator cultivates the character of a great soldier. Have you not read ‘My Command’ even though Adekunle, Hamman, Utuk and Boro did most of the fighting, but who brought Philip Effiong to Dodan Barracks? Who smashed Kalakuta Republic? Who visited Mandela in prison? Who brought Odi to their senses? Whose government has threatened the cowardly Niger Delta? Who put Charles Taylor in his place? Who asked for a tete a tete with Kabilla? Who offered to bring peace to Africa at the United Nations? Who is paying Nigerian soldiers ten dollars a day to die in Sierra Leone? It is Baba, our great Baba.

The benevolent dictator avoids offending against the modesty of the young and tries not to expose his shortcomings to the world. Look at all his wives and concubines, how many of them are below fifty? Have you ever heard of him consorting with Indian women? Have you ever heard of any woman in his family talking to him anyhow? When the daughter told him not to accept the presidential crown, that was out of love for him and should be forgiven, but did he listen to her? My friends, If you cut Baba he bleeds greenish blood.

A benevolent dictator must improve the city he lives in. Check out his past in order to understand his present, because ‘the past is pregnant with the future’. Didn’t he try to repair Western Avenue?, ingrates complained of traffic jam. Now, he is building a stadium in Abuja and people are whining. Look around you, what did IBB build apart from his hilltop mansion, which he has refused to invite me to visit. The Abuja stadium is going to be so big that all the Nigerian nationalities would be accommodated. Nobody, would accuse the Hausa , Fulani and Yoruba’s of taking all available spaces. Could anybody tell me what has been named after Baba in this our ungrateful country?, after all this man has done for us. Didn’t you hear President Clinton call him a world leader? The important airports are gone, all the big buildings are accounted for. The universities have already been taken. Do you want to name Ogun State University after a world leader like Baba? Is it true NaAbba and his House of Representative wants to name the stadium after MKO? No, the stadium is Baba’s legacy so lets go ahead with the stadium and we promise it will be named after him.

Finally, a benevolent leader must appear very religious. Has Baba not built a church in Aso Rock? Has he not employed a spiritual adviser on government pay? Have you seen him take sides on the Shari’ah issue? No. It is the Wakilin tsafta that has been flopping around announcing a return to the ‘status quo ante’ when Christians are around and chanting ‘vox populi’ when in front of the Caliphate. What did Baba do? He sent Danjuma to Turkey, because as a military tactician he knows he might need the use of neutral Muslims troops to deploy in the core north, and Ataturk’s military are known for their believe in a secular Turkish state. Who threatened the Niger Delta with ‘stupid and unreligious’ military action? Not Baba, he is too clever to do that himself. He sent his errand boy the wakilin. Which gives us room to appeal to him. Please leave Baba alone. He is my man.

One day we will wake up and find out that this man is no more and we will miss him. When would we begin to understand that in the life of a nation, great men are few and far between. Who else would possess the equanimity to tolerate the Nigerian dichotomies? Who would risk his life for Nigeria today? How many people truly believe in the unity and survival of Nigeria? How many people would risk the opprobrium heaped on him by his own nationality, the Yoruba’s, who abandoned him at the polls? My people, Baba is great and he was sent specifically down to Nigeria by God for our own good and you can take that or leave it. If you don’t believe me, go and ask him. ……….. It is called messianic narcissism.

Orok Edem